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2007 Demo (Sterile, Without, Devoid)

by Barren

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1.
She said, "Just give me 20 minutes to figure this out, and I don't think you should stick around, cuz I'm thinking I'm better without. Please take a few steps back. Let me do my own thing. I don't need you to keep me company. I don't wanna wear yr ring. Please take a few steps back. Let me do my own thing. I don't need you to keep me company. I don't want you to hear me scream. I'm feeling independent. I want to be alone. I want to learn from my mistakes. I want to do this on my own. Please take a few steps back. Let me do my own thing. I don't need you to keep me company. I don't wanna wear yr ring. Please take a few steps back. Let me do my own thing. I don't need you to keep me company. I don't want you to hear me SCREAM!" She said, "Just give me 20 minutes! To figure this out, and I don't think you should be around, cuz I'm thinking I'm better off on my own." 20 minutes later. It couldn't have come any faster..."I'm better off on my own. On my own." 20 minutes later she gave her answer. It couldn't have come any faster. "I'm better off on my own, on my own!"
2.
I never knew your situation. We were just friends traveling thru. I never had anticipation that you were so black & blue. When all you learned as a child, with a mother all on her own. Too much pain, too fucking early, it eats you to the bone. Why? Why suicide? This world's eating us alive! The pain is too much to bear. You're tired and can't keep fighting. Know that I am here. I am here for you when everything's aching and biting. I know it was your life. I know it was your choice. I want you here right now. I want you to hear this voice. Why? Why suicide? This world's eating us alive!
3.
Well, do you see me when I'm walking? Well, do you listen when I'm talking? My body's a battleground! It's my body, it's my choice! I am more than what you see on the outside. I'M NOT A PIECE OF MEAT! My brain, heart and soul is not non-existent. I'M NOT INVISIBLE! You can't build me up to break me down. MY BODY'S A BATTLEGROUND! You will not succeed in burying me in the ground. I'M NOT GONNA LAY DOWN! Shut out the close-minded people. Burn religious leaders on their steeples. Douse the president in the gas he's killing millions for. Abort the children of pro-lifers who kill whores. Fuck yr church! Fuck yr steeple! Fuck yr religion! Fuck all yr people! Listen to me, listen to me, listen to me, listen to me! I was born with one body. So I'll make one choice. To defend and protect this battleground. So now yr here and you will hear me. Listen to me, listen to me, listen to me, listen to me! I watch you warp minds. All the while surrounded by lies. Imposition of views. Dictated by the evening news. My body's a battleground! It's my body, it's my choice! My body's a battleground...
4.
What happened to everything that punk is supposed to be? It turns out it's just a fallacy. Bands with no views, scared to speak their mind. No serious subjects. Nothing that effects our lives. There's a sign at the show; "Leave yer machismo at the door." Something's gone wrong! I wish every show I went to was like that. Where if you fall someone has yr back. Cuz I'm sick of being run over with belligerent aggressive behaviors. Wear a skirt, I get groped. Wear a skirt, get called "baby." Something's gone wrong! Get looked at like I'm on the clock at a strip club. Something's gone wrong! Pushed over by people who're looking for a fight. Three times my size and twice my height. Kicked down to the ground. Get back up to hear, I hear "that bitch, that slut, that fucking whore"! I look around to see who's throwing the pitch. It's the singer?! Something's gone wrong! Suddenly I feel like I'm unable to stand. Am I seriously watching a punk band? Something's gone wrong! The wind is kicked out of me whether I'm up or down. Something's gone wrong! When derogatory words are being thrown around. Something's gone wrong! How would you like to be at a punk show thinking it's a safe space, Being called "faggot," "dyke," "whore" straight to yr face? Men can take off their shirts, but I can't wear a skirt without feeling hurt. Something's gone wrong!
5.
There's a world inside of me. It lives, it breathes. Moves on flawlessly. Sinking inside of me. Everyday I see that I can be who I want to be. Don't bring me down. I'll achieve effortlessly. Sinking inside of me! No mistake. Here's what I see; today it's you, tomorrow it's me. It's our fight. It's who we'll be. So take my hand and come with me. It's a struggle I keep sinking on foolishly. Keeping count of me. 1, 2, 3. 3, 2, 1. Sinking inside of me! I'm only so strong and I can't keep on. Your faces today, tomorrow will fade away. Fade away, fade away. I've been all wrong. I've been stepped on. I'm gonna push thru what's left inside of me. My world implodes every time I see thru. There's nothing left. It's me & you. Don't get me wrong, I can be strong. Life's one big fight gone on too long. Sinking inside of me!

about

Recorded July 2007 at Carter Studios in Chicago, IL.

credits

released August 15, 2007

Eric - bass/guitar
Sarah Jean - guitar/vocals
Chris - bass
Kisston - vocals

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kisston gorgeous Chicago, Illinois

Singer for Help Me Help Me I Can't Breathe. Guitarist/singer for SFO. Host of the OUTOFVOGUE Radio Show on lumpenradio.com

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